Live Coverage of Today’s Live Coverage of Today’s Apple Event
And now we’ll leave you with the Steve Jobs Summation: “our most advanced technology in a magical & revolutionary device at an unbelievable price.”
12:34: I just like posting at 12:34.
12:33: Steve Jobs “got the goods” to create a new market out of thin air.
12:31: OSX lovers brace to get ignored for another year while Apple plays with the new OS for this thing
12:28: It’s a whole new gold rush!
12:27: The iPad will change the way we do the things we do be do be do
12:24: Everything is better when Jon Ive says it.
12:23: Keyboard dock turns your tablet back into a laptop.
12:20: Okay the prices are actually reasonable.
12:18: “pundits” said it would be under $1000, which is $999. They’re wrong! It’s $2999!
12:17: Unlocked out of the door? You can use any SIM? Wow, take that, AT&T!
12:15: 3G via AT&T is $30/month for the “Unlimited” (read: limited, but we don’t tell you what the limit is) plan.
12:13: Steve Job’s new catch phrase: “Isn’t it great?”
12:12: Giraffe Graph.
12:11: Numbers moves this into the realm of justifiable business expense.
12:10: Soccer teams are always looking for a way to make attactive graphs of their players’ performance.
12:08: The Numbers presentation slides into a discussion of the American vs. Canadian tax systems.
12:06: All Keynote presentations must be about the great wall of China. Other topics will be allowed in later versions.
12:02: Keynote looks a lot like keynote, only you touch things now. How you connect it to a projector so other people can see your slides is anyone’s guess.
12:01: Phil Just took over Steve’s Chair.
12:00: Phil Schiller comes to tell us about iWork. Good ol’ Phil! Whadda guy!
11:59: Apple’s using an open format for their books? My mind, she is blown. In a good way. That is some happy news.
11:57: BOOKS! BOOKS! BOOKS! thank you.
11:54: Steve graciously nods to Amazon’s Kindle before completely dethroning it.
11:53: Did you hear that? That was the sound of every chess club in america writing an iPad app to track their games.
11:51 MLB.com will give you nerdy stats about baseball games. Trig fans rejoice! All six of you!
11:49: This just in! Car games! Whoda thunk it?
11:47: a quick glance at a painting program and off we go to more game demos from EA games. Order is restored.
11:44: The New York Times is hoping the iPad will save them from the inevitable death of old media. They could be right. Of all the newspapers, they have done the best job of using new technology.
11:42: Wait, only one game demo? What happened Apple?
11:40: Wake me when the game demos are over. Zzzzzzzz….
11:37: Nothing’s as exciting as new SDK’s! I mean, new features? Bah!
11:34: You can run iPhone apps in the middle of the screen and imagine that you have an entire foot of bezel around your iPhone.
11:31: It’s powered by AL GORE’S HAIR! I mean, an “Apple A4″ chip. Don’t know what that’s all about.
11:27: That surfing dog is getting a lot of facetime. He must be a personal friend.
11:23: Dangit, John Mayer got his lizard-like visage into this presentation. Why won’t you leave us alone, you substandard guitarist-slash-crooner?
11:21: Yep, look straight down and type. Your Chiropractor recommends you get an iPad immediately.
11:18: Why do I think all the trekkies are going to call this thing the iPADD?1
11:16: Steve is sitting comfortably, so the Moody Blues can stop asking, thank you.
11:14: The iPad looks like a giant iPhone. But I’m sure Steve’ll tell us why it’s not any second now. Any second. Any time now.
11:10: “Netbooks have no reason for existing” Take that, ASUS!
11:09: Last post from MacWorld says “Steve Jobs is on the stage” SO ten minutes ago.
11:08: Apple now owns all mobile stuff. They have their hotels on boardwalk and broadway. They rule the world.
11:06: Amazing picture of Woz.
11:02: Big Steve has taken the stage. Many people have taken pictures. 2/3 of the traffic on the internet right now is…well, probably unmentionable, but a LOT of traffic is Steve Jobs pictures going back and forth.
11:01: The time has come, no posts! WHAT IS GOING ON? Oh, wait, new post now.
10:55: Even from a few thousand miles away, I’m excited. Not about Jason Chen’s nose, you understand. About the tablet thingy.
10:54: Jason Chen is picking his nose.
10:53: I will never understand why people have “spoiler-free” versions of their liveblogs. What would you say? “Steve Jobs is talking about…a thing. It’s really amazing! It has… some features…wow, you’ll really want to see this, later, when you watch the “official” version”
10:44: Dan Moren should be told that the spawning possibilities at this event are decidedly low. His salmon metaphor is a bit creepy.
10:43: MacWorld’s Jason Snell begins his coverage of the event. He just told us where they are, a vital piece of information that Gizmodo somehow forgot.
10:39: We are trying to keep ourselves wanting an Apple tablet, and ignoring the small voice in our head that says it’s just a big iPod. Come on, Steve! Distort our reality!
10:02: Some guy at giz reveals that he’s not actually at the event. See, I told you I wasn’t at the event right off the bat. Which is why all my times are in MST instead of PST. CANS: the most honest of the rumors liars.
9:34: In a shocking last minute revelation, supposed leaked photos of the enclosure of the new device reveal that it looks a lot like an Apple product.
9:04: Nothing interesting is happening now. As you were.
8:43: Jason Chen from Gizmodo is already in line and already updating Giz’s live blog. So I’m going to steal his funniest comment yet:
I wonder what celebrities will be attending today. John Mayer2 ? Ralph Macchio? Yoko Ono?
Or Kanye West, as he runs up on stage, slapping the tablet out of Steve Jobs’ hands, exclaiming that the Handspring Visor was the best tablet of all time.
Live Coverage begins now! Like all the other sites, we’ll be top-posting, so updates are easy to read while the event is going on, and really annoying in the future. Because you can’t break with tradition.
That’s right! We’ll be offering live coverage of the coverage of today’s announcement later this morning! Think of us as Rifftrax 3 for the super-serious regular coverage of Apple’s latest products.
Also, unlike those other sites, we won’t bog your browser down with some javascript or flash monstrosity to auto update our blog! No! We put the power back into your hands with the re-introduction of the “refresh” button!
For those of you who like birds, you can also follow our coverage on twitter! simply follow @crazyapplenews or go to http://twitter.com/crazyapplenews.
So hold on to your seats and prepare to be amazed at the things we say about the things other people say about the stuff Steve Jobs talks about! It’ll be triple fantastic!
