Friday iFAQ: Pixelmator
Every Friday we publish a list of inFrequently Asked Questions and answers to help you, the Crazy Apple user, get more out of your Crazy Apple products.
This week: Pixelmator, the image editor that isn’t as expensive as Photoshop, but also isn’t as ugly as the Gimp!
Q: Why you gotta say the Gimp is ugly?
A: Ummmm, because it is? I mean, X11? Seriously?
Q: But it has so much power! It’s elegance is matched only by its–
A: Really crappy interface! And anyway, we’re here to talk about Pixelmator.
Q: Never used it.
A: What? That what possible questions could you have about it?
Q: None. Some shiny robot guy told me to come in here and ask questions or else he’d elegantly reformat my hard drive.
A: Well that’s just great! How am I supposed to write an iFAQ with a “Q:” Guy who doesn’t have any questions?
Q: You could ask me questions!
A: About a program you’ve never used?
Q: Yeah! Wait, no. Hmmm… I see your point.
A: Listen, just…just read these cards okay?
Q: This seems weird. I feel dishonest doing this.
A: Give ya a buck!
Q: Okay! Here goes. Ahem. “How will pixelmator make me mroe popular with the ladies?”
A: What? That’s not what I wrote! I would never misspell the word “more”!
Q: Well, yeah, but your question was boring! Anyway, if it can make me more popular with the ladies, then I might be interested.
A: Okay, whatever. Look, if you can make a real nice picture, with like, hearts and flowers and print it with the lady’s name in the middle and stuff, then maybe that’ll help a little bit.
Q: What if I don’t know her name? What if I always just call her sweet–
A: Then you have bigger problems. Now, can we please just ask image manipulation questions?
Q: Okay, fine. How can I make an image do my bidding?
A: What?
Q: Why else would I manipulate it? Other than to torture its psyche, that is.
A: Yeah, okay, we’re done here.
Q: Don’t pretend you haven’t thought about it. And anyway, why haven’t you answered my question!
A: Well, you can warp, twist and blur your image. Does that help?
Q: A little.
A: Fine. Bye now.
Thanks, Nate. Yet another pixel editor I might be interested in if I hadn’t been using Photoshop since version one (for example, I have GraphicConverter out of a sense of duty but never have a reason to use it). It’s boring to already have everything I need.
The only thing I could use is clairvoyant software that would feed me the correct lottery numbers in time to buy the winning ticket. Hip me to that, brother!
Sigh. I spent all that money on Photoshop …….