Crazy Apple News Site

Every Friday we publish a list of inFrequently Asked Questions and answers to help you, the Crazy Apple User, get more out of your Crazy Apple products.
Today’s Edition: Terminal.
Editor’s note: Due to budget cuts, we have replaced our human iFAQ writer with a very small shell script. Specifically, a script that pipes all questions to Eliza, the built-in psychologist.
Q: What is the best shell to use? Bash? ZSH?

A: Does that question interest you?

Q: Um, yes. That’s why I asked it.

A: You are sure?

Q: Yes… Look, nevermind. Is pico or nano better?

A: Please go on.

Q: Okay, well, some people say that nano is better, but I’ve always liked pico.

A: When?

Q: Oh, I don’t know. Ever since my dad showed me how to use the command line when I was ten, I guess.

A: Who else in your family showed you how to use the command line when you was ten you guess?

Q: Well, Mom tried to teach me emacs… Wait! Who’s asking the questions around here?

A: Can you elaborate on that?

Q: I’m supposed to be asking the questions!

A: Does it please you to believe I’m supposed to be asking the questions?

Q: Stop that!

A: Please go on.

Q: Okay. My mom tried to each me to use emacs, be she used vim. Is it because… she didn’t love me?

A: Who else in your family didn’t love you?

Q: My dog.

A: Pets can produce complex emotional responses. Tell me more about your dog.

Q: He tried to bite my face.

A: Did you have a good relationship with your face?

Q: Umm… yes?

A: We all need love. Tell me more.

…And that’s all the time we have. The iFAQ goes on for several more days.