Every Friday1 we publish a list of inFrequently Answered Questions and answers to help you, the Crazy Apple user, get more out of your Crazy Apple products.
Q: Oh man, this is great!
A: Really? Usually it takes you a while longer to get on board with these things.
Q: No, seriously, what problem could I possibly have with a simple, all-in-one vpn solution?
A: You’re not freaked out about having passing through someone else’s vpn servers? Not going to get all bent out of shape about Seattle’s weather, or their abandonment of the coffeehouse?
Q: Look, I don’t know what your deal is. I like hanging out at said coffeehouses, and when I’m on their wi-fi it’s good to know that nobody else can read my packets.
A: Well, sure, I think it’s pretty great too, but usually I have to talk you into these things. Come on, we had a whole rhythm going.
Q: Look, I’m a sensible consonant. I like to make sure my data is going where I intend it to go and not wandering around the café without my permission. This company’s pricing scheme is super reasonable, their technology works on OSX and iOS, I just…don’t see the problem here.
A: Well there you are then. I guess my job is done.
Q: Yep, I’m totally happy with the Cloak and Dagger vpn service.
A: Um, there’s no dagger, actually.
Q: What’s that?
A: It’s not “Cloak and Dagger”. It’s just “Cloak”.
Q: Oh man, this changes everything!
A: There it is.
Q: I mean, how can you have a cloak without a dagger?
A: This is what I’m used to. Blind, unreasoning panic.
Q: I mean, I’ll keep using it, but, but…it’s just not cool any more. I wanna keep my activities secret, but what if I ALSO want to stab people?
A: You…should see a therapist, I guess?
Q: I’m leaving. That’s all there is to it! I’m out of here. You expect me to stay here and put up with this?
A: Well, that was fun.